Book Review
Surprise Child: Finding Hope in Unexpected Pregnancy

Leslie Leyland Fields is a writer, teacher, wife, and mother of six children living in Alaska where her family runs a salmon fishing operation.  She has experienced two unplanned pregnancies and has talked to countless women about this not unusual life changing event.  She has written a unique book providing in detail, the initial reactions of several women in very different circumstances, to a surprise child.  The unexpected advent implied failure, mistake and accident.  The realities reveal unexpected joys, strength and victories.  It is a sad commentary on our times that a new life so often elicits feelings of loneliness, desperation and ambiguity in mothers, and fathers.
           
According to the U.S. National Institute of Health, 60% of all pregnancies in the U.S. are unplanned, this translates into 3 million women, half of whom choose abortion.
           
According to the book, mothers in various stages of life, from teen to grandmother, express their doubts about their ability to cope.  Some are rejected by the father of the child and yet persevere, while others get full support from
father and family.  Careers are interrupted, plans changed and entire lives re-routed.  Not all mothers were able to keep their child due to difficult life circumstances.  Yet the unfolding of these pregnancies chronicles a surprise of strength, hope and joy.  “Someone utterly new, never before known” exists.
           
Many women immediately respond with joy on learning of a pregnancy, but for the many who face the news with anguish and doubt, this book is helpful.  In fact, it is helpful to all mothers because we forget the immensity of motherhood.  And older mothers can learn to appreciate the added pressures on young mothers today, who have an array of technologies which can complicate decisions and intrude on the natural impulse to accept life’s surprises.
           
In times when motherhood is not central and cherished in society, this small book could be a lifeline if put in the right hands at the right time.  With abortion so available, “free of charge”, pressures are added to which some succumb but which many resist heroically.
           
Many stories recounted in this book are of loss, separation and reunion.  Stories of apparent hopelessness, with time, turn into happy endings – “how much light he’s brought into our house!”  Some mothers, involved in drug abuse and partying, changed their lives entirely to accommodate the baby and now say “this baby saved my life.”
           
Many mothers are familiar with foolish and hurtful comments made about their large families and in response to the news that they are “expecting again!”  The book contains resources for support and discussion groups, contacts to help new mothers and teens, information about health and adoption.  These are American sources but some can be used by everyone.  One discussion group question asks “Our culture defines success mostly in terms of money, power and independence.  What other measures of success do you think are more important?”
           
Every chapter of the book begins with a statement on the developing child and the physiology of pregnancy, as well as a scriptural quotation to elevate the mind and remind us of “something of greater value”, eternal value.
           
So many mothers found that they were wrong about their fears:

• We didn’t expect to love this unexpected baby as we do.  We didn’t expect her or him to love us as each does… we forgot about love.
  
• He was a surprise only to me.  Nothing about him was a surprise to God.
  
• Who are we to decide who lives or dies?
  
• All our mothers made room for us.  We will do the same.
  
• All of us could have ended these lives in a few moments, secretly, with only a doctor knowing.  We could have gone on with our lives just as planned, trying to maintain control over our bodies and our future.  But who can count or measure what we would have lost?
  In carrying this child you are giving her or him a chance to be.  Without being what else matters?     

This is a book truly worth writing, and reading.  For more information about the book and the author, see www.surprisechild.com and links.

This article first appeared in “REALity” a publication of Real Women of Canada.  This book review has been reprinted with permission.